I feel it necessary to make you all aware of the dangers of using this cleanser as all over body wash….
I haven't been able to sit down for an hour.
Citrus should NOT be used in anything that could possibly be used between the legs.
If blogging about my stupidity saves only one of you, it will be worth it.
Shower carefully friends!
And that is why I am so upset that the thirty plus pictures that we took today NEVER happened. My memory card was left out of the camera and we didn’t realize it until the mess was cleaned up.
SHIT!
Pumpkin carving with Pickle was hysterical.
As fast as I pulled the pumpkin’s guts out, she put them back in. I mistakingly thought she would stay away from the insides because of the slimy texture, but she didn’t mind it at all. It became a game I was losing at. After a few attempts at re-stuffing the pumpkin she decided to sample the stringy shit. All of us in unison, screamed, "No Pickle!" Well, she loved that, so she continued to stuff her face with it. It was disgusting. When we stopped gasping every time she did it, she grabbed the lid off of Jayden’s jack-o-lantern and took a bite. …That’s when I decided she should join me for a car ride. Once she pisses off the kids, she gets so revved up we can hardly contain her. Eating Jayden’s pumpkin crossed the line!!
I wish so badly we had the pictures we thought we took.
These are the things I don’t ever want to forget.
Happy Birthday Tylon Jacob!
You are fourteen years old today!
I have started this letter/blog post about five times in the last hour and I can’t seem to get past the first sentence. ( I keep choking up.) As crazy as you make me about your birthday, and all the activities you want to do, and all the plans, and all the yapping I listen to for months and months, up until it actually happens, it is all worth it when we wake up on July 4th and you are still with us.
When you were born the doctors said you wouldn’t live to see your first birthday. Oh how we partied on your first birthday, and then the 2nd, and 3rd, and 4th. We have been partying every single year on your birthday because we know what a miracle it is that you are still with us. We do not take your birthday’s for granted. We celebrate each 4th of July and the nation celebrates with us. Parade’s, picnic’s, fireworks, and celebrations all across the USA. I think God knew exactly when to send you to earth. He knew that you would want a PARTY!
The special needs you face are common. Mental retardation and heart problems are nothing out of the ordinary. But the chromosonal abnormalities that you have are extraordinary. Trisomy 9p is so rare that it doesn’t even have a name. The exact amount of extra material and where it was translocated is unique to you. The Drs have very little information about your genetic makeup. We think you are just a nut! You learn at your own speed and in your own way. Your big head is right in front of mine this very second trying to read what I write. You can pick out a few key words and you are making up the rest. You think I am telling the world that we are going to Target to buy you a new helmet. I love you Ty, but get out of my way!
You are both a challenge and joy, much like a typical child. I wonder often what the hell I was thinking when I brought you home, but I honestly can’t imagine this family without you. You are like the glue that holds us all together. You were and are the first piece of this family puzzle. If you hadn’t been such a joy and so rewarding to raise, I would have NEVER adopted all these kids. You started it all boy. I know when I read this to you, you will understand very little, but to the last sentence you will say, "I didn’t start it, I not."
There are not words to properly express my love and adoration for you. You wouldn’t understand them even if I had them. But you do know shopping and food, and that, I can do. So baby boy, let’s go to Target! It’s your favorite place on earth, and lets shop till we drop, and then eat till we’re sick. I will even let you stay up late and watch the fireworks, because it is, after all, your day.
To borrow your words, "I lucky" to be your mommy.
Happy Birthday Ty.
Forgive the interruptions from Brandon and Parker during the video, and ignore Ty’s crooked teeth. He has been seeing the orthodontist for over a year and we are ALL patiently waiting for a few more teeth to come in so we can put the braces on. Otherwise enjoy this kids excitement. IT IS ALL WE TALK ABOUT!
You all know I am a sucker for people with Special needs. Ty and Pickle will most likely spend their entire lives with me. I am NOT(usually) complaining about it at all. I took these pictures last year with the intent to frame them and hang them. 18 months later, that is still on my list of things to-do. Blog posting will have to count for something. At least they are on display. I hope these pictures make your heart pitter pat, like they do mine.
Most of the time, I would be one that makes light of a kid getting caught with a playboy, or spending a little too much time in the shower. But the issue we are currently dealing with is not one to take lightly or joke about, in my opinion. This kid, is a child, not an adolescent.
It began on September 19, 2007. I remember the date because I sent an email to Bronson asking for his expert advice on being a boy and whether what I found on the computer was “normal” boy behavior or “concerning” boy behavior.
In the email, I stated that I had found porn on a computer. In the history of one of the little kid’s computers “nipplz.com” and “grlzbuts.com” had both been searched. It seemed like something to chuckle about at the time, because the boys were so young and innocent. I was proud of the attempts at words, but not at THE words. This child was clearly sounding things out. At that point in 2007, I was thrilled.
Much to my dismay, the searches did give this child of mine what he was looking for. While only seconds were spent on each sight, it certainly alerted us to the fact that we needed parental controls on the computers. We spent the rest of the day installing safety zones on each of the four Mac’s we had at the time.
Fast forward to present day, now almost two years later. Without giving you the identity of my child, I will say this, he is under twelve years old.
Two months ago, I was changing the sheets on his bed, and I found two of my Victoria Secret catalogs, and a bunch of candy tucked into the side of his bed. I was pissed. He has been stealing my magazines and my treats. I tried to be calm, but all the while I was thinking back to 2007. This child had just busted himself. Since at the time of the computer incident, I had two kids on the exact same reading and spelling level, that both spent equal amounts of time on the computer, I was never sure who had done it. Both children insisted it hadn’t been them and promised and swore they would never type such things. I had my suspicions then, and at the time of the sheet change, eighteen months later, they were confirmed.
I approached said child, with the stash of goodies in my hand, and very calmly talked to him about taking things that don’t belong to him. I didn’t flip out, because this child is explosive and reactive. I had a very calm and very nice talk about being sneaky, stealing, and asking for things before taking them. I didn’t say a word about the content of the magazine, or about why he had them, or what he was doing with them. Because what do I say? I honestly don’t know. This child is a child and shouldn’t even be thinking about things like this.
I am a pro about sex talks with my kids. Sex isn’t a private matter in this house. It isn’t a dirty word. Questions get answered and discussed weekly. But this child hasn’t even had his first maturation clinic at school. I have yet to see armpit hair or any other outward signs of puberty. I would have NO business talking about SEX with a CHILD! Yet, here I am faced with a child that clearly needs to have something said to him.
I am getting ahead of myself here, because I haven’t even told you about the latest and greatest.
On Sunday night, Hunter walked into the room where Brandon and I were sitting and said, “We have a problem.”
He had been in the computer room and glanced up off his computer and saw in the reflection of my glass cupboards what the other child was viewing on his computer.
Hunter said, “I can see you through the reflection, genius. Get off that computer. I am telling mom.” And that’s exactly what he did.
This child was on a computer that the kids don’t use, because we haven’t hooked up their games and approved sites to it. Desi uses it and the big kids when they are home. Clearly this child knew that things could be accessed on the internet. We pulled up the history and had to make Hunter and Hadley leave the room, it was that bad. He had been viewing this stuff in our presence all weekend long. We sit in the same room he does, but because of the way that computer faces, he was never caught.
He clearly has a problem. He is bold and brave and has little, if any, remorse. He has been grounded from the computer for life. But that doesn’t solve the problem here. That just prevents him from accessing it. In my opinion the problem still exists.
This entire thing is so complicated because of the issues this child has and deals with. If it were any other child, I have great ideas of what to do. Nothing we have done or tried, in regards to other behavioral and emotional problems, has worked with this one. I am truly heartbroken that we have added this, of all things, to his already full plate of things to deal with.
I have contacted a few summer camps with therapeutic behavior specialists and counselors for him to look at. I am willing to wash my hands of summer school for him and just find him something constructive to do with his time and his mind. He needs help and I am not sure where to find it.
I could write novels about the emotional and behavior problems we have dealt with in this child. But honestly, it’s him that’s dealing with it, not me. We are just players in his life. He has been dealt a shitty hand and he is going to have a tough life. We want nothing more for him than happiness.
We spend many nights in bed discussing this kid and what the best thing is to do for him. He just doesn’t fit in any mold. He is my biggest conundrum. I love him dearly and I want him to find peace. I just don’t want that peace to be rated XXX.
Signed-
one frustrated mother
PS- If you are a regular reader, you most likely know which child this is, but please don’t name names in the comments for his sake.
It is not smart to break rules on haircut day.
It’s not smart to tell your mom you hate her in the middle of a haircut. At least wait until the haircut is finished so you don’t look like a DORK at school on Monday.
Life lesson’s from Ty Ty.
Three days after you were born I did just that. I found a family that wanted you badly and promised me they would take good care of you. They spoke with your Dr on the phone and traveled to Virginia to pick you up. I was so happy that you were going to a wonderful family that would get you the medical help you needed and the therapies you would need as well. I had a child with special needs, so I talked with your soon to be mommy for hours on the phone about the joys and blessings of raising a child like you. She was prepared for the unexpected.
I went about my busy life. I had lots of babies to care for of my own. I heard from one of my workers that you had been discharged and were flying home to Utah I was so happy that you were well enough to leave the hospital. Two days later I got a call that the family couldn’t keep you. They had taken you to their Dr at home and he told them you wouldn’t live to see your first birthday. The family got scared. They loved you so much and didn’t think they could go through with the adoption. They didn’t want to lose you.
I was stressed. We had a hard time finding the first family to adopt you. I brought you home with me for a few nights while I prayed about what to do. I had my hands so full with three babies under two. I didn’t think I would be able to take good care of you. But, it was Thanksgiving, and my other workers were busy with the holidays. So I kept you with me.
I remember how you didn’t like being put down. You were much happier in my arms. I remember how you didn’t make any noise, you just pulled sad faces when you cried. I justified keeping you in bed with me because ‘how would I ever know if you were crying if no noise came out?’ I was falling in love with you quickly. I remember taking you to the children’s hospital because you were turning blue when I would feed you. They started you on oxygen. They learned more about your kidneys that day too and we scheduled an appointment with the urologist. The ER Doc also said you looked like you had a syndrome of some sort. Because you had so many anomalies and such a funny face. He called a geneticist in for a consult. The appointments had begun and I was getting sucked into it fast. I had to take you to all of these appointments so I could get all the info I could about you in order to find you a permanent home. Everyday with you was going to make it harder to give you to somebody else. I prayed everyday I would find the perfect family for you. One week later I did.
I woke up on thanksgiving at 4am. You were sleeping peacefully in my arms. I felt at that moment that I knew who you were, “Brylee Elizabeth” What a beautiful name. I said it out loud. It felt good to say. It sounded beautiful to my ears. I announced that morning at breakfast that you were staying. I also announced your name. I knew where your family was, we were right here. It felt right!
Today you are turning five years old. While your birthday serves as a reminder that you are not a typical five year old girl, (There will be no pink, glittery, party favors, no friends to play princess with, no giggly girls over to do pretend makeup and eat cake and ice cream with) I am so happy with you just the way you are. We are just plain over the moon that you are here with us and happy and that you have had five great years in your own little way. I often wonder if you know how much I love you. I hope you do. I hope there is a place in your little brain or your little heart that KNOWS.
I will try and be a good mommy to you. I try everyday to be patient. I try everyday to understand the things you are trying so hard to communicate with us. Please be patient with me while I learn how to take care of you.
I love you so much and I am so happy I listened to that little voice. I am so glad I know you are mine. It is an honor to have you and take care of you. You give us a run for our money but I wouldn’t have it any other way. You are a joy to parent. It would be a different life without you in it, a life, which I hate to imagine. There would be less hitting, scratching and blood, less time outs, less screaming, less sign language, less ball dribbling, less toy chucking, less food pitching, and less poop throwing. There would be less chaos and less mess for sure.
But there would be less adventure, less rewards, less teaching and less learning, less growth, less laughter and less love. You complete our family Pickle. You are an integral part of us.
Happy Birthday Pickle!
Love , mom
I found Tylon while working as a phlebotomist. He was one of my regulars on a list of AM blood draws in South Davis Community Hospital. Ty was the first pediatric draw I was ever scheduled to do. I was nervous. I didn’t want to hurt a baby. I love babies! I had a pep talk the night before from my supervisor. She told me, “Never sweat drawing a baby. If you can’t hit a vein the first time in an extremity, go for the scalp. Newborn’s heads are very vascular.”
