We get this one a lot. ”They are related now” is the correct answer. But they are not biologically related. All were adopted as newborns from all over the US.
How many adopted?
We have ten adopted kids. I have four homegrown.
How many boys/girls?
This question always stops us and we have to count. The number is ever changing and we can never seem to remember. I counted today, so I know. 8 boys and 6 girls.
How many with special needs?
We have six kids with special needs. Some severe, and some with learning differences and behavior problems.
Hunter has Aspergers, ADHD, OCD and out of this world anxiety.
Tylon has Trisomy 9p.
Jayden had a brain injury at birth. This has resulted in behavior problems: ODD, anger management and significant learning delays
Colby and Dalin were both 24 week micro-preemies.
Colby suffered a grade II brain hemorrhage. It has affected his fine motor skills and academic learning.
Dalin was born crack addicted on top of being a 24 weeker. He has Cerebral palsy and significant delays as well.
Pickle is undiagnosed, and she is the most special needs of all. She was much like Ty in the beginning. She was very medically fragile. Today she is healthy, but TOTAL Special ED!
Where did they come from?
In order minus the bio’s: Utah, Indiana, Illinois, Washington, Alabama, Alabama, Utah, Virginia, Mississippi, and Texas.
How do you remember all their names?
Can you believe people actually ask this? It cracks me up. I am sure they can remember all their children’s names and cousins and relatives. This seems the dumbest question of all. Of course we know and remember all their names. WE NAMED THEM.
How do you stay so calm?
Do I sound calm? I am glad I have this blog to freak out on so I can appear calm in the real world. You all know me better than anyone I meet on the street. You can all attest to the fact that I am not sane.
How do you feed that many/What is a typical meal?
This is another crazy question to us. We feed this many the same way we feed two or three. You make dinner and feed them. We just make bigger portions. Brandon does the cooking, I do the laundry. If Brandon wants to cook, more power to him. If Brandon doesn’t cook, we are going out, or phoning in a delivery: Chinese food, Pizza, Taco Tuesday, McDonalds….. Anything is better than me having to cook. I HATE to cook. I hate it! I have to cook when the big kids are home because they beg me to. They want the food they grew up with. So they come home from school and give me their puppy dog face and I have to make Sour Cream Lasagna, Spanish Rice, Yellow Chicken, Spaghetti and Beef stew. If they used to eat it, they want it again.
I did a post a while back that will give a sense of the amount of food and other trivial stuff. You can see it
here.
What do you drive?
We drive a 15 passenger van. Brandon calls it the prison vehicle. He feels like he is transporting inmates. We only drive it when we go to the beach or Disneyland. When we are around town, we take two SUV’s because Hadley is embarrassed to be seen in the Van.
This was taken yesterday on our way to the beach. Count the kids. Go ahead, I ‘ll wait……Yeah I’m missing one. We took the pictures and noticed while we were loading up that Pickle wasn’t with us. This is exactly why I don’t get mother of the year nominations. I don’t always know where they all are.
Do you all go out at the same time?
Yes, of course. We do dinner out about once a week. Our favorite places to go as a family/parade is Sizzler and Ichibiri’s.
At Sizzler, the kids go nuts at the Salad bar. We also enjoy terrorizing the elderly that frequent Sizzler. They damn near have a heart attack when all ten kids go running towards the salad bar. It looks as if they haven’t been fed for weeks. They are throwing elbows and fighting over the salad tongs. A fight always breaks out over the last chicken bone, or the last square of jello. It is priceless. This is one of the benefits of being a different race than the kids. I can sit back and pretend they are NOT mine. I watch as the elderly scan the restaurant for the heathen’s parents. I pretend I am looking for them too.
Ichibiri’s is a Japanese steak house. I love it because the food is cut up and just the way the kids want. Since it is cooked right in front of them. They can say, “yes or no” to rice, veggies, teriyaki sauce, or whatever. I never have to hear, ”That’s not what I wanted.” It is also fabulous food. We may have to go there tonight.
We go to the beach often. We are locals at Newport. The kids are well known at “Beach Burger”. We drop the cash at the counter on the way to the sand and the kids spend all day going from the water to the Burger joint. The owner knows my kids and knows my rules. We love NEWPORT BEACH!
How big is your house? How many rooms?
Our house is 6000 sq feet. It was the best we could do in SoCal. It was not easy to find a place that would work for us. But we did. In Orange County you can find big, but these homes are built for rich couples that entertain, not large families. We had to turn a storage room, a family room and an office all into bedrooms. That still leaves us three family rooms and a huge backyard to play in. The rest of the house is the kid’s rooms. Hadley has her own room. Everybody else shares with a sibling.
Do they all get along?
They are siblings…….They are best friends one minute and worst enemies the next. Since they all joined our family as babies, it is no different than adding a bio child to the equation. They are siblings, simple as that.
How do you afford it?
Brandon would like me to solicit donations with this question. I have attached a pay-pal link to make it easy for you to help us….. Just kidding. Brandon has been working in Nigeria for the past three years trading crude oil. We have been blessed. It isn’t always easy, but we have sufficient for our needs.
Are you Mormon?
YES of course we are Mormon. Who else thinks it is OK to act this crazy and have this many kids? In all seriousness, I was raised in the church and have practiced the religion most of my adult life. I am not currently active and after the prop 8 saga may never return, (You can read more about my rants
here.) but time will tell.
It is NOT easy to take this crew to church for three hours. I am currently looking into a Mormon church that believes in one hour programs, that includes a ball pit for the kids to play in, and diet coke and refreshments for the parents.
Is this a yours, mine, and ours situation?
Yes and No. I share eleven kids with my Ex. Brandon and I together have three. That equals fourteen. If we add his four from his first marriage to the equation we have eighteen. BUT we are not raising his kids, or parenting them. His ex has full custody and they only come down a few times a year to visit. So I don’t count them in the number. This is a touchy subject and we deal with it a lot. For those of you that say, “you must have a heart of gold, you’re capacity to love is amazing…….” Just come on over and hang out with me when the step kids are here. I struggle. I am trying. I think I will spend the rest of my life trying. Please don’t leave mean comments about this on here. I have shut down my blog before because of some judgmental-mean-ass haters. In fact, I got lambasted with so many horrible emails from one disgusting individual, that I published them for the world to see in a different blog. I will say this, it stopped the emails.
Do you ever get away alone?
Yes, we live from one sex trip to the next. It is honestly the only way we keep our sanity. We also go out alone at least once a week. That is a must!
Do you have help?
Hell yes! I have had a nanny since September. She is wonderful and I wonder daily how and why I did it without her for so long. Oh yeah…. it’s because I have been scarred for life by my previous nanny, who decided to marry my ex. That definitely made me leery of nannies. It took a lot of time to get over it. I am happy to say that I am doing better.
Why did you move to California?
To get away from my previous nanny who decided to marry my ex. AND of course Brandon and I both have an Ex we didn’t love living near. AND because I hate the cold and the snow, and I felt Utah was too small of a place to live in after a divorce. I wanted a fresh start and sunny weather.
Last but not least ARE WE DONE?
hmmmmm…..Today? Yes! I am done for sure! Tomorrow could be a different story. I always know when a baby is coming. I feel it in my bones. I am not feeling like anyone is missing. I am not looking for a baby. But I hate to close the door in case one comes along that needs a family.
Brandon and I still may pursue IVF again, but the Hell I go through to get nothing is stressful. I have learned one thing through the years. ”Never say Never.”
I have to keep my chit chats in full view. If any of you out there are trying to steal my heart, Brandon wants me to warn you all what it costs to support me and this crew. None of you will even dare think about me!