They come once a week. They speak ZERO english and they just let Pickle out of the backyard.
How do you say, "I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!" in Spanish? Or will that get me in trouble because something will be lost in translation?
Anyway,
We found her five houses down. What a way to start the week.
I am off to take Hadley shopping for school clothes. One more week before it starts. Let’s all keep repeating that.
One more week.
One more week.
One more week.
Happy monday friends.
See this beauty?
This is my baby sister Courtnee.
And this is my baby brother Cayden.
As you can see, my Dad finally made it across the border to visit. It was about damn time!
This is my step mother Heidi. I love her. She is a fabulous wife and mother. She has the patience of Job. Her and Brandon will both have a special place in heaven for dealing with people like my dad and I.
They promised me they would come up after the new baby arrives. That’s always a sure bet to see my dad, I just have to have a newborn in the house. He is a sucker for babies.
I could go on and on about how great it was to have my dad here and how thankful I am that I have at least one parent that loves me and respects me, but honestly, it’s sad that I even have to think that way. I adore my father, whether I am talking to my mother or not. He loves me and my family. PERIOD.
The kids, Ty especially, acted like Santa was here. My dad was the ring master of this circus today. Between the pool, the food, and the football game in the backyard, it was a riot.
Controlled Chaos.
Jazzi cried when they left. Ty hasn’t shut up about Grandpa, and suddenly, I wish they lived next door. I may have a good cry too.
Hurry back Dad.
We bought a new wagon. How did we ever live without a radio flyer? How do you like these new age wagons? They have seats and seat belts. By the time we buy another one, they will be equipped with air bags.
Oh Jace, right back at you babe.
I could eat this baby up. I love her so much. This is the new naughty thing. As soon as I get her diaper off, she tries to crawl away. She thinks it’s a game and laughs and laughs. She is turning into a little teaser like her brother.
Speaking of which, he was being a little teaser and was running around with my toothbrush, and ran full speed into my bedroom door jam. This is his first goose egg. I was worried about brain damage for a minute, but I figured if he sustained any, he would just fit into our family even better.
Ellie is playing outside with me while we are on "Goose egg watch." She is always happy to stay up late.
Calvin got a haircut. He always comes home looking like a rat. But I love him so much I don’t care. Tang and Storm are now bigger than Calvin. He is once again the smallest one in the family.
I found myself taking pictures of the damn swelling every minute or two. It was growing in size at rapid speed. Poor Parker. He is just happy I am letting him stay up past bedtime so I can watch his pupils. Like I can even see them in those dark eyes.
We are experiencing a heat wave in So CAL. Tis the season for our state to burst into flames. I have felt like we were ready for our own spontaneous combustion, so I ran to Toys R Us and I bought a new pool. The old one got popped and we were ready to die of boredom in our house. I chalked it up as a necessary expenditure. I tend to do that when Brandon is gone.
Isn’t it sweet? The kids were in heaven.
…Except Ellie. She is terrified of this large, colorful contraption in her yard. She cried when we went near it. It also didn’t help that the kids scream the entire time they are in it. I think she may think they are being eaten by this monster.
Notice how Pickle stands at the bottom of the slide to hit or scratch the kids that come down? She is way smarter than we give her credit for.
Dalin struggles getting up. His legs aren’t strong enough to climb, so he is attempting to do it all with his arms. The first time up, no problem, once he is wet though, he slips off every time. Hadley wants me to make sure and write that she is helping him up and not just grabbing his butt.
This here is Parker’s favorite thing. He stands, naked at his post, teeth chattering, and squirts the kids, and the house, and the porch, and me.
Oh good, look Hadley, this is proof you were helping him and not just touching his butt.
Now back to Parker who stole the show. Is there anything cuter than a naked baby? We have swim diapers, we really do, but he went in and out of the pool so many times, I finally said, "To hell with it, we are in our own backyard. Who cares?"
and then, he looked up at me, and squirted me right in the face, and the lens. I may need a new Camera. Another great purchase while Brandon is gone.
Hunter and I were visiting on the porch.
Hunter- "Does it ever freak you out that Parker was an embryo like two years ago?"
Me- "Not really."
Hunter- "It’s weird, It’s like he just appeared out of nowhere."
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How do I know we spend too much time on the computer?
Brandon is holding Ellie and I hand him her pajamas. He says, "You want me to log her in?"
I am yelling at the kids and putting the word "at" before their names.
"I am going to beat @parkerbenson."
Parenting geek squad style.
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I was talking to a friend last night and she asked if my mother was still dating the same guy. I explained that my mother and I don’t talk anymore, AGAIN. She mentioned that there was a new guy on my moms facebook. So I jumped up out of bed and ran to the computer to get on facebook and check this info out, and my mother was missing off my list of friends.
WTF?
Yep, she UN friended me. I was dumbfounded. But then I shouldn’t be surprised at all. This is so her. I guess she couldn’t stomach seeing me in her news feeds.
WTF? I hope I never hate my kids. The thoughts of that are mind boggling. How do you ever get to that point with your own children?
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Speaking of parents, My dad is coming on Sunday. I know you’ve all heard that before. (He got a little side tracked last time and shall we say, got detained against his will? That sounds good.) Anyway, bless my step-mothers heart. I think he has shit together this weekend and he will be bringing his family up to play.
When he called to tell me he was coming I said "Thank god. I need your help." because you all know I am single parenting and the weekends without the nanny SUCK. But he didn’t know this.
He said, "Do you want me to bring my truck?" and for a brief second, I thought he knew why I needed his help, and he was going to try kicking it ‘old school’ like he used to, and take the kids for rides in the pickup on the freeway. Because honestly, what’s more fun than that?
But then I realized he thought I needed him to move something or haul something, and not to help me entertain. Damn.
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I have a tooth under my pillow tonight. It’s been years since the tooth fairy came to my room, but Dalin is frightened of the fairy so I have his tooth in my bed.
Me- "Dalin where are you going with your tooth? You need to put it under your pillow so the tooth fairy can come."
Dalin- "I’m putting it under your pillow because she freaks me out."
alrighty then.
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I got in a fight with Brandon yesterday. He was tweeting and I freaked out. Fighting when you are 7000 miles apart is never fun. It especially sucked when it dawned on me that he is in one of the most dangerous parts of the world and what if the last thing I said to him was "fuck you?" So I stopped fighting WAY faster than I normally do and I forgave him for answering someone’s question on twitter. Honestly that was all he did, and I flipped out. I wish I wasn’t such a jealous, paranoid, bitch but I think the cards are stacked against me.
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In other news, I have made it two nights alone. I haven’t even had to break out the vibrator yet. Damn missing sex drive.
This is the only picture I have of my days in the body cast. I was born with crooked legs, and back in the day, after therapy, braces, and corrective shoes, the last resort was orthopedic surgery. I guess they still do that in the present day, but the difference is this, NO CAST. My cast went from nipple line to ankles and I wore it for 6 weeks. There was a hole cut between my legs so I could use the bathroom in a bedpan. I still have nightmares about the bedpan.
It was amazing to me how many people remembered this ordeal, (and mentioned it) when I was at my twenty year high school reunion. I was out of school for 7 weeks, but I got to visit on two occasions, Valentines day and a special movie day to watch Joe Panther. My mom brought a bunch of pillows and laid me on the reading group table. I’m sure I was quite a sight. I have no idea how I was transported. I wonder if my mom put me in the trunk or if I fit in the back seat. SInce I couldn’t bend at the waist I am not sure how I got from home to school. I never remember a car ride.
Anyway.
I passed on my pigeon toes to Bronson who in 4th grade had the same surgery I did, but he got by without a cast. Thank heavens for both of us. I still packed him around for 4 weeks, but I didn’t have the extra weight of the plaster weighing him down. Oh the joys of passing on our genetic problems.
This post is dedicated to all my peeps from Muir Elementary. Thank you again for never teasing me or making fun of my crooked legs and/or my cast. I went to school with NICE kids.
..and I can’t post this picture and not mention the carpet. Holy Shit! This is at my Grandparents house. Had I grown up in this home, my rage issues would be far worse.
In response to a message asking me if I was mad or upset at her. (This was after we spent the previous weekend hanging out.)
I have written three different drafts about this unnecessary drama in my life, but I can’t seem to get it right. So for lack of a better option, I have copied and pasted the emails here. Names have been removed. I am sad.
To Friend-. August 9, 2009
We are in the inland empire somewhere. Jace just made it to the finals. We are over the moon excited and proud.
Please don’t think I am upset at you ever. I just don’t have a lot of time to be a good friend. I can’t and don’t do needy. So if you need me more than you are getting me you won’t be happy with me.
Have a good week. Love you.
Dear Sandi- August 24, 2009
It’s been bugging me so I need to be upfront with you and let you know that I was hurt by your email…the one where you said, "I don’t do needy…" I really thought that we were friends, no, like family! Sandi, I adore you and your family but totally felt disregarded by your email. More like our friendship was trivialized because I reached out as a friend to you. I’m not sure what you consider needy but with my friends, I am willing to drop all that I have to come to their rescue if that’s what’s needed. I’m willing to be a shoulder to cry on, no matter what time it is. There’s something about knowing that no matter what happens, I’ve got your back and I’d hope the same for me. So, forgive me if I misconstrued that we had that type of friendship. I realize that you have a life and we live a distance but in my opinion, friendship has nothing to do with distance. If there’s a will, there’s a way. So, I guess I do, do needy…in fact, if you’re needy, that’s okay because it may be my turn this week and your turn next week but who’s keeping score?
Correct me if I’m wrong but that’s just the way I see it. I would much rather know that I’m valued as your friend than to be viewed as just one of your blog followers. At least, that’s what I’d hope for in our friendship.
I needed to get that off of my chest. Life is tough enough at times without keeping in crap instead of facing it.
Thanks for letting me be honest.
Love,
Dear Friend- August 24, 2009
First, I am beyond thrilled that you trusted me enough to share this with me. I am sorry you have carried this and that I hurt you.
My first gut is to tell you, I am not the friend you want. But, I hate to tell you that for fear you will feel tossed out. I do not want to hurt you or make you feel like I don’t want you in my life, because I do. But being a friend takes work. It’s like any other relationship, you have to give. In my life, I don’t have a lot to give. What I do have, I give to Brandon and to my kids. I feel spread thin and sometimes needy myself. BUT, I know that friendship is not one-sided. I will not be the friend who calls and needs and wants and then whenever my life is good, ignores your calls and ignores your requests for time. That, to me, is selfish and I can’t do it.
I have loved and enjoyed the friendship we have. I haven’t felt burdened, or like I have burdened you. I felt we had a good thing. A phone call when we both had time, a comment or two on the blog, a g-chat when we had a minute. I loved that you came over with your daughter and spent time with us. But, I loved that you had other readers, other friends, and a life in your town.
So, when out of the blue I get a message that says, "are you mad at me, have I done something wrong?" My first thought was ‘Son of a Bitch, I should have known this was too good to be true.’ I don’t know what you could have possibly done, or how you could have upset me, but that message did. I have had needy friends in the past and they sucked the life out of me. If a day or two went by and I didn’t call them, they would leave the same kind of messages. I can’t take the guilt and the demand from one more person. I learned after my first marriage that the only friend I needed and wanted was the man that I am married too. Everything and every person is second to that. If Brandon ever leaves me, or dies in Nigeria, I will be a VERY lonely person. But I will have ZERO guilt of not spending all of my time and energy on him and our marriage. He is my NUMBER ONE!
Somewhere there is a friend that has the same level of need as I do. It will be a busy mother of lots of kids that can only break free when her husband is out of town. It will be a friend that appreciates the tiny text message or tweet and doesn’t need or expect anymore or think I am mad at her if weeks go by and she hasn’t heard from me. Because she will be as crazy busy as I am and unable to even pull her phone out of her pocket if it rings. She will have the same passionate love affair going on with her man and she won’t think twice about it if I cancel plans with her last minute because it was too hard to leave Brandon.
I hoped you and I could have had a normal adult friendship and hoped that we could learn from each other as we travel the road of loss, divorce, and a fresh start. But I meant it when I said I couldn’t do needy. If you called me tomorrow and said, My mother died, or the kids got in a car crash, or my man just left me, There would not be a thing I could do for you. I couldn’t leave the kids and drive to you because it takes all three of us(mom, dad, and nanny) to do everything that needs to be done around here. I would feel sick and if I could hide in a corner for ten minutes and be a listening ear I would because I love you, but those are the absolute facts that come with being my friend. I am not a good friend because I have VERY little to give. For that I am sorry.
Again, I am so sorry that I can’t be the friend you had hoped for. That being said, I do not think of you as just one of my followers. I think of you as a friend, but that is because I thought we had the same expectations. Distance has nothing to do with it. I hope I proved that to you by driving to meet you half way. I hope that the clothes I purchased for your little one were not something you think I would do for all of my readers. I hope that you know I truly do care about you and what you have to say. I just don’t have the time to be the kind of friend that you are looking for. So, if that means I am just one of your readers. I totally understand.
Thoughtfully,
Sandi
She hasn’t responded to me. She has blogged about it and I apologized in her comments. She tweeted about it, I replied with an apology. I feel terrible I have hurt someone. But I am at a loss. What do I do?
This is my least favorite scene. I hate saying Good-bye. I have been following him around like a lost puppy for the last few days. I don’t love it at all when he is gone.
He is off on business and "ten days to two weeks" feels like an eternity.
Breathe in. Breathe out. I can do it. I have done it before. It never seems to get easier when he goes. I miss him so much already and he’s only been gone for 3 hours. I’m hopeless.
Olivia was my contestant and is now my winner. Congrats to Olivia. She played for Shaylee’s prize, the $250 gift card to Best Buy. I asked her what beautiful city Colby was born in. It took a little help, but she got it and COLBY was thrilled! The correct answer is CHICAGO!
YAY Olivia.
Ty picked the winning number today. When Pickle pulled it out of the bowl Ty acted like he had won the lottery. I have been trying all morning to get the video of the drawing up and I keep getting FAILURE notices. Sorry I continue to FAIL, I’m doing the best I can…..
Anyway, I am done messing with it until Hunter wakes up and figures the sucker out.
Happy Monday friends.
I can’t even believe how well it went. I didn’t shed a tear. Okay, I got choked up a few times, but only because New Orleans is alive and well and buzzing with spirit. Driving past the Superdome was a powerful reminder of what I only watched on the news exactly four years ago this week. I honestly can’t imagine living and surviving here. But it is alive and flourishing after the tragic disaster.
Tulane was/is fabulous. The community feeling is strong. The Green Wave is alive and well. We left Bronson very happy in his new life and great adventure.
I can’t wait to return and visit. I am thinking of driving from Houston when we pick up the new baby and buzz over here so Bronson can meet his newest sibling and Brandon and I can check in on him…. and eat some more good grub. You all know I am NOT a foodie. For God Sakes, I think Waffle house is gourmet. But Brandon and Bronson were in heaven dinning on Seafood and Cajun. They were like kids in a candy store. Me, I found a waffle house 24 miles from where we were staying and I made Brandon take me on a little road trip for a waffle. It was worth the drive I tell you.
When we landed on Friday we hit the nearest Bed Bath and Beyond and purchased everything he would need for his dorm. Then we hit the town for a little Bourbon street action. if you have been there you know what I am talking about. If you haven’t, let me do my best to describe this insanity. It’s like Vegas on steroids in a smaller more condensed package. Strip clubs and bars and live music and street freaks and booze. So much alcohol!!! But still friendly and fun and touristy. I hope to hell I never hear about my children working, hanging out, or living on Bourbon street. Are you reading this Brons?
Saturday was move in day. It was a dreary early morning, but it heated up fast, and the humidity almost killed me. He lives on the 9th floor of Monroe. I walked those damn stairs four times. Nine flights. With every step, I thought, Holy Shit, how will we ever get Parker and Ellie to college? i will be 16 years older than I am today. I am going to have to have a motorized cart by that point.
Question for you all that live here in the humidity. How do you do it? ….and the bugs? Oh my Hell, I was standing at the rental car pickup location and this erratic bug flew at me, and it was bigger than the birds in my yard, and I almost peed my pants. I am not a fan of insects, but that’s a gross understatement when the insects are bigger than my face. If that thing would have flown in my car, or landed on my body, I would have died. Honestly.
"Why aren’t you wearing the green shirt they just gave you?"
"I don’t want to look like a freshman."
"smart."
Goodbye baby!
CALL ME ONCE IN AWHILE! Or I will stop paying your mobile phone bill.
I am sitting at the airport right this second, counting down the seconds until I see the rest of my kids. I miss them so much when I leave. I am back down to twelve at home for a few more weeks. I am going to enjoy the hell out of the next month while I have this tiny crew.
